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Experiencing A Posada in Laredo, Texas

My second night in Laredo my brother and sister-in-law invited me to a party that included a posada.  My idea of a posada – a ninety year old colonial style hotel overlooking the Rio Grande that originally was a convent and then the public school my father went to.  Dictionary definition: A Christmas festival originating in Latin America that dramatizes the search of Joseph and Mary for lodging.  And yes, I have heard of posadas but I’ve never participated in one. 

I wasn’t sure I wanted to go to the party.  I’ve visited Laredo many times through the years but haven’t lived here for years.  Not knowing if I would know anyone, or how friendly and welcoming they would or wouldn’t be, concerned me - insecurities I’m sure.  What I remember about people in Laredo are the cars they drive - Cadillacs, Hummers, Mercedes or living in the exclusive neighborhoods, wearing the right brands – Gucci, Armani, and many I’m not familiar with and wearing Rolexes.  A past time might be shopping at Joe Brand’s, a specialty designer smaller department store.  I’d rather buy a ski pass than spend money on fluff.  I shop at TJ Maxx and Loehman’s and brag about the $600 suit I purchased for $70 or the $130 pair of jeans I found for $25.  I drive a 1999 Camry and am glad it’s paid for.  My sister-in-law convinced me to go when she said, “You said you wanted to do things that were different – here’s your chance.”

We drove into a gated community to the house where fifteen to twenty cars lined either side of the street.  As we carefully walked on the pebble stone driveway on this misty, 40 degree night, my brother’s friend, John, the owner of the house was on the phone outside.  He had on Birkenstocks and socks – I felt perhaps I was in Boulder, Colorado, not Laredo, Texas – instantly at home – although I gave up Birkenstocks and socks some time ago.

The buzzing of voices from the forty or so guests hit me as we walked in to deposit our coats in the front office.  The wine was on the front counter and I knew a small glass would help me let go of any tension.  In the sunken living room was the biggest display of nativity sets.  I can only imagine the hours John his wife, Conchita and perhaps their children had painstakingly unwrapped and delicately handled each piece.  It brought back memories of visiting Santa Claus as a five-year old child at Joske’s, a (now defunct) department store in San Antonio, Texas seeing the elaborate Christmas themed train set and decorations.  My discomfort disappeared and for the second time this holiday season, I felt joy at being around these festivities.  (See my previous blog entry).

A folded sheet with the words for the posada songs was distributed.  Okay, when I visit Laredo, I know the weather will be in the 70’s in the winter.  Not this night and the women were asked to go outside and feel the moist cold that penetrated through our coats.  The men stayed inside.  We began at the back of the house by the kitchen and sang the first verse in Spanish where Joseph asks for shelter.  The men sang there was no inn at the first door.  We moved to another back door where we sang the third verse asking for shelter.  And again, they sang back to let them sleep, they were not opening the door.  In between everyone prayed Hail Mary and walked around to the front door to sing the next verse.  The men sang back letting us in to the living room where we all sang in chorus.  In English the last verse is:
 
 Blessed is the house
 that shelters this day
 the purest Virgin,
 the beautiful Mary.

And I have to admit, although I have a daily spirtitual practice, believe in the goodness of people and have a strong faith, I am not at all religious.  I respect other people's faith and believe in praying.  That night I admired the ritual I witnessed and the brief time we were outside was fine.  

Then it was time for this wonderful homemade dinner including encilantradas – chicken in a spicy tomatillo cilantro sauce, tamales, salsa, turkey, tortillas, salad, frijoles borachos, arroz estofado, mini corn tortillas – a delicious rice dish generously topped with Muenster cheese.  John mentioned that all the recipes were originally Conchita’s mom and she and several of her relatives and friends contributed to the delicious feast – nothing at all from Costco or Sam’s at this gathering.

As we were eating, my brother and sister-in-law introduced me to their friends.  And I recognized several from way, way back.  Cha Cha lived with her grandmother for nine months when I was three two door away from my home in the late 50's - yes hard to admit it was that long ago.  I also remembered most of her brothers and sisters.  Conchita played a queen when she was in eighth grade and I was in third or fourth grade at the same school.  Everyone was so welcoming, gracious, friendly and I wondered why I anticipate that people may not exactly be friendly in Laredo.  Is it me thinking this?  Apparently in this group it certainly was.  And I feel fortunate and thankful to be a part of it.    

Click to see a short video clip. 
 

Christmas in South Texas - A Bilingual Silent Night

I remember one night riding a school bus with fifteen other fifth grade in our Catholic school gray and blue plaid uniforms. Sister Gloria, in her full black habit trimmed with white – we couldn’t even see her hair - directed the bus driver to our first stop, a nursing home.  We had practiced, memorized and harmonized for weeks - Angels We Have Heard on High, Hark! The Herald Angels Sing, O Come All Ye Faithful, The First Noel and many more - the repertoire of songs we would sing that night and at midnight mass a few days later. 

One of the later stops included my home where my parents opened the door when they heard us singing outside and smiled. After our songs, they offered us ojarascas, delicious Mexican sugar cookies, and hot chocolate. I was wearing my blue cardigan for the chilly night in Laredo, Texas - nothing like the winters I now experience in Colorado.

Since then I’ve seen Christmas carolers at malls, churches, and at A Christmas Carol at Denver Colorado’s Stage Theater – an excellent production. But no one’s ever knocked at my door to sing Christmas carols. Until this past Sunday night more than forty years later.

Thirty minutes after I arrived at my brother’s house in Laredo, thirteen students from Laredo’s Texas A & M University (TAMIU) three year old music department filed into the family room. My sister-in-law, Bertha had arranged for them to visit so that her mom and aunt, both struggling with age related issues would enjoy the Christmas season. Most of the six young women had Santa hats on, red sweaters and black pants. The seven young men were dressed with white shirts and black pants. Their goal - to raise money to attend the Texas Music Education Association Convention February in San Antonio, Texas by caroling during the season. Their financial ambition would become our pleasure.  

One said, Thank you for inviting us to your house. Although we are all into music, not all of us are singers, but we will do our best. 

And they did. Accompanied by a keyboard they serenaded us with six not so usual carols. They sang Silent Night bilingually - several verses in English the last verses in Spanish. In the middle of the concert, four of the students removed one cello, two violins and one viola out of their cases while the others stood to the side. One of the four, said how the cold snap affected the wood and tuning their instruments took more time. It was in the low 40’s. Not even close to the minus 10 degree night I’d just experienced the previous week in Denver. But the humidity seemed to touch my bones and consequently I always feel colder in Laredo.

One of the selections was titled Santa at the Symphony – a blend of classical music and Christmas carols including Mozart’s Eine kleineNachtmusik, Silent Night, Beethoven’s Symphony No. 5 and The Twelve Days of Christmas. The other string quartet selection included Alleluia intertwined with ‘Tis the season, Silent Night and others. They put their instruments away and ended with Feliz Navidad.

At a very inexpensive $30 or so a visit, I didn’t know how they would reach their goal. But they proudly assured us that they were at least half way towards it. I imagine if an organization in Denver was doing the same, they would charge a lot more. And I would think that the students in Laredo, Texas, probably could too. But in charing less, they bring so much of the true season of Christmas to more homes.

My brother, nephews, sister-in-law, her aunt and mom and I were captivated by the music and the chorus. They left us smiling and joyful. I was taken back to my childhood when Christmas was about family, gifts, tamales, turkey, dressing and vacation.  And this year, thanks to Bertha, my visit started by taking me back and enjoying the wonderful music.

I saw the smiling faces of the nurses and older patients at the nursing home that                             my classmates and I had visited in fifth grade. And I imagine that night, they  remembered their family and enjoyed our not-so-perfect voices as we sang our Christmas carols.

Can Barack Obama Make Us Happy?

With the latest political scandal involving Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich and our new president-elect’s senate seat, it’s good to hear Obama say he wants the governor to quit although at first (surprising) he was cautious about stating this.  As a registered Republican, one so in the middle of both parties that I should actually be an independent (why isn’t there a third strong political party?), I didn’t vote for Obama. There I admitted it. After attending the Democratic Convention in Denver, I struggled with the decision but that’s another story. Now I want to believe that Obama was not in any way involved in the scandal with the Governor.

I want our nation to feel good again.  I want Obama to succeed in rallying the people of the United States to be positive.  I want Obama to really do things differently – the change he spoke about and take our nation out of the doldrums of a recession and attitude.  I want to see his general positive attitude and ability to get things done. I want him to inspire, take control and help change the attitudes of people.  I want to believe in his honesty and integrity. 

 

Can he make us happy?  Well that is supposed to be up to us.  I was so impressed to read that Obama was already coordinating the economic plan with Democratic leaders and hoped to sign it into law the day he takes office on January 20. Whether that gets done or not – we’ll know next month.  But here’s to hoping he does.  And maybe it well help the nation to snowball to a better place where we are all a bit more optimistic and even a little happier.  

 

Am I A Food Addict or am I Just Mean to Myself?

I just read that Oprah is embarrassed and mad at herself about her weight gain (back at 200 pounds) according to an article on Yahoo News provided by AP.  I look at her and think she is beautiful, accomplished and super successful – what does she have to worry about?

I am a year younger than Oprah, not as (even close to being) successful or accomplished and this past weekend I was getting mad at myself for gaining 8-1/2 pounds since the beginning of summer.  The biggest problem - I threw away my true fat clothes several years ago when I was positive this time I’d never gain the weight again. 

The latest “fat clothes” I bought three years ago at Old Navy – so I wouldn’t have to spend a fortune while I was a bit overweight - don’t fit anymore. When I wore them this past Saturday, my stomach hung over and hurt from the jeans being so tight plus I wore a shirt that hid the upper portion of the jeans.  I told a new acquaintance last week, “Let’s not talk about gaining weight. I can only fit into two pairs of pants in my closet.”  She said, “Don’t even go there – you’re going to make me feel really bad.  I am at least thirty pounds overweight.” 

And I know she's right.  But why do I get so mad at and down on myself?  Normal Body Mass Index for my height and weight is 18.5 to 24.9, overweight is 25 to 29.9, obese is 30, mine is 23 (Oprah’s BMI is 31.8).  So I have 2.0 to hit overweight.  And if you grant me the age excuse and saw  me in person, at One Twenty something and a half (I had listed my actual weight but I hate looking at it in writing),  you’d probably say I wasn’t overweight (perhaps I hide it well?).  Plus I actually do have low thryroid (just like Ophra) according to my blood tests but I refused to get on medicine until the second blood test, a year later, showed it was true. For a year I was in denial. 

I imagine I’ve lost at least 100 pounds (10 or so at a time) in my lifetime.  And gained even more.  I’m a lifetime member of Weight Watchers (yes it helped for years), tried the South Beach diet (good and easy) and the grapefruit diet (for a ½ day).  I’ve walked, skied, lifted weights, cycled, hiked the Colorado mountains, joined health clubs.  But not consistently – at least not the past several years when it is more important than ever to really care for myself. 

And the more frustrated and down I get on myself, the more I want to eat.  The more I eat, the worse I feel about the clothes that don’t fit.  I remember as a child my mom asking me several times each meal “don’t you want more"?  I would tell her, “I’m not hungry mom.”  I owned my diet.  And now when I feel frustrated, worried, I want to eat because I want to taste her homemade roast and fluffy mashed potatoes and remember her smile. 

Can I be happy with the 10 plus eternal overweight pounds?  Can I just relax and buy new bigger fat clothes?  Can I admit I am from the baby boomer generation and that’s just life? Can I quit focusing on how bad I feel, how fat I look, how my clothes don’t fit?  Can I concentrate on the positive and thereby attract the opposite of what I’ve been feeling?   Doesn’t this law of attraction say that we get what we focus on whether it is good or bad?

One morning last February I was applying body lotion when I realized how meticulous I am when it comes to skin care.  With the dry Colorado weather, I apply body oil right before I get out of the shower.  As soon as I dry off, I use a heavy lotion on my body and I finish with a sun block lotion.  Before I go to sleep, I apply a heavy cream to my feet, face lotion, lip moisturizer and under eye cream. 

If I can take such good care of myself on the outside, why couldn’t I do the same for the inside?  I remembered Dr. Oz on Oprah and the organs he showed from bodies of healthy and unhealthy cadavers.  It was an epiphany that stayed with me for a while.  That is until I quit reading my affirmations (following) and the weather got cold and snowy in Denver. 

So, I’m back.  And I’ve started going to the health club again when I can’t go outside.  And I’ve even lost a pound.  I went grocery shopping and cooked several meals on Sunday for the week.  And here are some of my daily affirmations:

• I am thankful for the nutritious food I eat daily.
• I am grateful for the great walks I take 4 to 5 times a week (or go to the health club).
• I appreciate the wonderful, healthy food I buy weekly.
• I enjoy cooking delicious home-made meals.
• I take care of myself by eating just enough to feel full knowing there is always more food should I get hungry.
• I take care of the inside as well as I do the outside.
• I enjoy occasional deserts.

 And I’m not a food addict.  I just need to be gentle with myself, look at the positive things in my life and enjoy every day.  We all need that, yes probably even Oprah!